it’s a misconception
that stuffing a hole
will fix it.
it will fill it
the definition
the logical assumption.


thing about holes
they’re kinda gaping
kinda their own gravitiational force
attracting and capturing


up until recently,
never thought about it
that way.
only knew I urged
for something
to make it stop yearning
make it go away


but a hole is still a hole
even when you pour in
or clamp shut
the w/hole thing


how unfair of me
to force in whomever
I felt gave me life
– unkind to drop in the ones
I love or cherish or feel safe
and alive with


still a hole,


pushing a person
into the darkness the lone
the cold and below
won’t change that
just the way you feel
then need then realise
it won’t make the hole
go away
the feeling
just the sensation of relief
and the loved one


so now
I live with holes
scattered across
some even swallowed each other
how ironic


and now
the holes won’t go away
just simply
because I feed them what they want
in fact
they grow stronger


so now
I just
let them be let them bleed me
inches from death
cause you can’t make a hole
unless you learn how to
let it grow